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Is it appropriate to include a gift card when sending someone a sympathy card?
December 11, 2009 | In: Sympathy Gifts
My husbands 26 year old niece lost her father yesterday. On top of that, two months ago she had a stillborn baby. She had a nervous breakdown recently, so her father passing away is just terrible. I was thinking about sending her a sympathy card with maybe a gift card enclosed. Would that be inappropriate? Should I just send the sympathy card alone?
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9 Responses to Is it appropriate to include a gift card when sending someone a sympathy card?
ablondenamedbubbers
December 11th, 2009 at 6:03 pm
I think gift card is too impersonal. If you are going to give a gift, make sure it’s something you put thought into and could be used as comfort. (ex: when my friend’s rabbit died, I bought him a bunch of his favorite candles). If you can’t think of anything or just don’t want to include a gift, how about writting a personal message in the card?
tonalc1
December 11th, 2009 at 7:00 pm
No, just write the card.
If you want to give her a gift, give her the gift of your time.
Stelly
December 11th, 2009 at 7:51 pm
I think that would be a nice thoughtful idea. When people are depressed, it’s nice to know that others care. Give them a gift card for gas, or a restaurant.
lil' miss
December 11th, 2009 at 8:15 pm
Sending the gift card with the sympathy card would be alright. She might be taking some time off of work and might need the money to buy groceries and other things. I don’t think it ‘s inappropriate at all.
Claire
December 11th, 2009 at 8:17 pm
Yes that would be inappropriate. Send a card, and a big bouquet of flowers. Your niece is in my prayers and I hope her path in life becomes a happy one. Give her your time and your love, thats what she really needs right now.
queen_of_hearts
December 11th, 2009 at 8:59 pm
Right now the bereaved needs more emotional support than financial support.
So just send a sympathy card right now, (you can even send her flowers) and when her birthday comes up send her the gift card to her favorite store/restaurant.
You can include this in your sympathy card:
—————————————————————————–
“Dear ___.
There is not enough words to say to take away the pain and loss away of your dad. Just to let you know that you are in my thoughts and prayers and hope you find the strength and peace to move forward during this difficult time. If there’s anything I can do, please don’t hesitate to ask. I will be happy to be there by your aide.
(If you are willing to help her out in any way, for example: clean house, cook, walk dog, water plants, make phone calls, send a financial contribution, etc… be sure to include that, if you are unable to help out, do not include that statement.)
Sincerely yours,
(your name)
——————————————————————————-
After you send her a sympathy card, it’s always a good idea to keep in touch with the bereaved. For example, phone call, email, snail mail, etc. To give her more support.
Hope this helps!
Brian A
December 11th, 2009 at 9:59 pm
Send the card and maybe some flowers or some other thoughtful gift. A gift card to like a spa or something might be nice, but just throwing money at her because of her grief just rubs me the wrong way at some level.
tehabwa
December 11th, 2009 at 10:26 pm
No.
Tragedy is NOT a gift-giving occassion — those are celbratory. It makes it sound like “Congratulations!”
It would be better if your wrote an actual letter than simply sent a card.
At least write a note on the card.
nikita
December 11th, 2009 at 11:02 pm
Just the card will do. This is not the time for her to go shopping. If you want to help her out financially, a check is better.